You are the expert on you, so share the knowledge.
Key points
- Share with your manager what you need in order to perform at your best.
- Two-way feedback and open communication between employees and managers improves performance.
- Be respectful of your bosses managerial style, keep it a dialogue, and suggest specific solutions.
Many of us spend a significant amount of time reflecting on our strengths, weaknesses, and what motivates us. But when it comes to work, we often assume our manager will figure it out, or we remain hesitant to speak up, fearing it might come across as demanding. However, one of the keys to a successful working relationship is clear communication, especially when it comes to how we are managed. In fact, providing your manager with insights about how you work best is not only helpful for you—it’s beneficial for them too.
Letting your manager know how to manage you isn’t about making unreasonable demands; it’s about creating a collaborative relationship where both you, your boss and the company can thrive. Research shows that feedback and open communication between employees and managers about work preferences help foster continuous learning and performance improvement. Here are some practical steps to share with your manager what you need to perform at your best.
1. Know Yourself First
Before approaching your manager, take the time to reflect on your work style. What situations have led you to feel motivated and engaged? What type of feedback helps you grow? Are there certain conditions under which you struggle to stay focused or productive? The more specific you can be about your preferences, the better.
2. Frame the Conversation Positively
When approaching your manager, frame the conversation in a positive way that highlights your goal to improve your performance and work collaboratively. Indeed, scientific studies have demonstrated that employees who feel empowered to voice their preferences and needs are more engaged and perform better.
For example: “I’ve noticed that I work best when I have clear, structured goals. I feel more motivated and productive when I understand the bigger picture of what we’re trying to achieve. I’d love to hear an overview and your thoughts.”
“I’ve realized that receiving feedback in real-time when I’m with a customer makes me lose concentration. Could we wait till I’ve finished with the customer to get the feedback? It will help me to understand, implement and improve quicker”
3. Be Clear and Specific
When telling your manager how to get the best out of you, be as specific as possible. Vague statements like, “I need more freedom” or “I need more support” can leave your manager unclear on what you mean or how they can help.
Instead, say something like: “I work best when I have flexibility in how I structure my day, So, for me, a short check-in with you in the mornings is best.” Happily, research shows that employees who experience autonomy—having the ability to make decisions and express their preferences—are more motivated, engaged, and productive.
4. Acknowledge Their Management Style
Your manager may have a particular style that works for them and the team. Be mindful of this when you approach them. You aren’t asking them to change who they are as a leader but instead suggesting adjustments to improve your collaboration.
For instance, if your manager is very hands-on but you prefer more autonomy, you might say:
“I know you like to stay involved in the details, and I appreciate your input. Because I work best when I have space to problem-solve on my own, could we wait with reviews till I’ve finished and then I’ll immediately circle back with you to get feedback?”
This way, you show respect for their style while also making your preferences clear.
5. Suggest Solutions, Not Just Problems
When bringing up your needs, don’t just point out what isn’t working. Managers appreciate team members who come prepared with ideas and options. This shows that you’ve thought about how to improve things rather than just pointing out problems.
For example: “I’ve noticed I struggle with time management when working on multiple projects at once. I think setting up a weekly priority list would help me stay focused. Does that sound like a doable idea to you?”
6. Make It a Dialogue, Not a Demand
It’s essential to approach the conversation as a two-way dialogue, not a one-sided request. Ask for your manager’s input and be open to their suggestions as well. By making it a conversation, you can build a stronger, more collaborative relationship.
For instance:
“I’d love to hear if there is anything else you’ve noticed that I could do in order to improve further?”
Conclusion
Knowing yourself is key to success, but being able to communicate that self-awareness to your manager is even more critical. By thoughtfully and positively sharing how you work best, you can create a more effective working relationship, boost your performance, and contribute to a healthier work environment.
References
1. https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2007-17338-011
3. Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (2000). The” what” and” why” of goal pursuits: Human needs and the self-determination of behavior. Psychological inquiry, 11(4), 227-268.